Is anyone else here experiencing cryocrastination? I've got it bad.

I keep reading the same webpages over and over again.
I keep having the same internal debates over and over again.
I keep deciding to move forward on this over and over again.
I keep not moving forward on this over and over again.

I've been waiting for my gut to be on board with my decision. I've been waiting for years for my gut to get on board.

Now I can see that my gut is never going to be willing to acknowledge any topic related to death.

You would think that would be enough. I should be able to say, "My gut is wrong. I'm doing this anyways", but it seems that it isn't enough. I've mustered all my internal strength, and it's not enough.

So, as embarrassing as it to admit this, I think what I need at this point is a bit of hand-holding.

If there is somebody else out there that is also stuck, and also requires some hand-holding, maybe we can help each other. If I was doing this as part of a team, I think that would provide a sufficient amount of motivation.

You know, it's one thing to let myself down. I can that all day long. But letting somebody else down stings in a different way.

Wanna help me/yourself move forward on this?
Go Team Your-Gut-Is-Wrong ?
anyone?